This morning I cried. For context, I do not give into my emotions very often. I am what some people consider an empath, someone that feels the emotions of others so strongly and deeply that they feel like my own emotions -- if you believe in that sort of thing. All I know is that I tend to cut myself off from feeling because when I feel it, I feel all of it. It can be debilitating.
This morning, I was overwhelmed.
I felt the helplessness of those isolated. I felt the mourning of those that have lost. I felt the fear of those that are now financially insecure.
I felt the anger of the oppressed.
Social media is a wonderful tool. I so appreciated reading studies this week that highlighted how the youth is allowing social media to positively shape their future. I've enjoyed using the community assignment as an escape from the realities of our world as I focus on a happy and insignificant topic like Disney.
I have, however, struggled to put myself in a place where this feels important. When our nation is feeling so much hurt, when there are people not given the same advantages of this escapism simply because of something like race, how do I justify inaction at any moment?
I can say I am proud for not pushing aside blatant, systematic racism when I have encountered it in the past. I've cried in the office of leaders questioning the morals of others that champion the empowerment of women, just not those women.
I am thankful for social media and the voice it provides to the communities that demand change. I am thankful that certain platforms are taking it upon themselves to remind users that glorification of violence and spreading of misinformation by those in power is dangerous. And yes, freedom of speech is important, but its powers are not absolute.
Will this be the time? We have seen video evidence of lives degraded and taken away too many times. Yet, this never seems to be enough to spark outrage that is long lasting. There doesn't appear to be real repercussions for the accusers. The system remains in tact. Will this time be different?
This week I thought a lot about authenticity and the online persona in relation to context collapse. I think I am still marinating on those thoughts as I see those in my circle posting inspirational quotes or say they are demanding action. I've also seen keyboard warriors that completely miss the point. Are these people afraid of people thinking they are white supremacists if they don't outwardly proclaim the opposite? Is this their authentic self? Will their internet activism have impact beyond a like on their post?
Yes, yes, and yes. Kendyl, you so thoughtfully put into words what I have been feeling this past week. After learning about context collapse this week, I can understand why people want to remain apolitical on social media for professionalism purposes but this is not an issue to remain silent on. You just can't.
ReplyDeleteUgh, this's powerful! I LOVE the word 'marinating'.. It's a wonderful word to conjure up a process, like a journey! It's a very active word and I can feel how you're really actively immersing yourself with some of the concepts that you're exploring! Just a friendly reminder; BE KIND TO YOURSELF!
ReplyDeleteThis is an overwhelming moment. I've come to tears 6 times in 24 hours, and I'm not one to cry (a few were excited/good tears: a graduation, the excitement of the SpaceX launch). We have heightened emotions, and we are seeing each other's raw emotions online along with various politicized statements.
ReplyDeleteHI Kendyl. Thanks for this post. It's been a really overwhelming week for me as my research is centered on how to hear racism, and other isms (e.g., heterosexism, homophobia, genderism, ageism, etc.) come into play in music learning and other environments. I appreciate your willingness to not remain silent, and to do the hard work of unlearning harmful actions that affect Black people, like myself. Empathy is often used as an end all be all for racial justice. Sure, it's helpful stage in the process building anti-racism into one's life. However, I think many non-Black people are forced into the painful parts that come with building empathy and racial consciousness. After years of being socialized and coddled into systems that are built to harm BIPOC, I wonder about the types of psychological processes that are occurring right now through the posts, comments, and shares on social media by those who want to help and are just now taking the steps to do better than they have in the past.
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